My plan had been to write a blog post every week for 2018. Eight weeks into 2018 and I’m just now starting. What can I say? Life has a way of waylaying our plans.
Because I write Christian fiction based on actual life experiences and events – mine or others I know – my blog posts for the next 44 weeks will be about those things that have influenced my writing.
Forgiveness. Easy to say but not so easy to do. But, oh, the freedom in forgiveness. In December 2016, my dear friend and former pastor’s wife, Betty, went home to Jesus after a long struggle with Parkinson’s. The last week of her life, I went to the care facility every day to spend time with her and her family and friends who visited.
A young man our family had a history with showed up one evening. He hung back, talking with Betty’s son. “He’s afraid you will be upset he’s here,” someone said to me.
I was taken aback. It never occurred to me to be upset. Apparently, for years he had carried the weight of the wrong he had done against me, one of my daughters, and my family. The truth was that I had forgiven him years ago. So, I hugged him, conversed with him about his health – he had had a recent heart transplant – and I left later with a feeling of joy mixed with sadness. He had carried an unnecessary burden for so many years.
Needing a new heart, then having heart transplant surgery, is sure to cause a person to ponder his or her life. I’m sure this young man – I say young, he’s nearing 50 – thought about his mistakes and people he may have hurt.
We first knew him when he was a freshman in college. He encouraged a romance with my 12-year-old daughter that eventually led to her running away with him when she was 17. This story has many facets, details I won’t go into, things that shredded my heart during a time I was dealing with my divorce after 22 years of marriage.
I forgave. The young man – a talented musician – has been happily married for many years with a beautiful wife and three children. My daughter has been happily married for years – a pastor’s wife with three children.
He was there at Betty’s memorial service, on stage playing his trumpet with Betty’s son and others, honoring Betty with some of her favorite worship songs and hymns.
Considering eternity, what does it matter? With God’s help, I chose to forgive. If there’s someone you need to forgive, determine to do so. This wasn’t the first and only time I had to forgive a deep hurt. I’m not saying it’s easy, but it’s so worth it.
